How We Get Our Exercise Around Here

Lately the only way we have been able to stop Stanley (or “Stan Lee” as Chris prefers) from scraping and whining at bedtime is to put his collar on, attach a leash, and walk him briskly around our house.

The weather here has been too cold and rainy to walk the dogs outside, and the way our house is structured (tiny spaces separated by stairs and more stairs) means that we don’t have a large enough area to play with the dogs inside. So a walk around our house means circling through the alley known as the kitchen, into the dining room, around the paper tray for the dogs’ business, between the dining room table and hutch where Mina prefers to do her business, around the broken coffee table and the ramp for Mina resting on the couch, and over computer cords on the other side of the dining room table. No, we do not live in a crack house; why do you ask?

Usually Mina and Paco just ignore Stanley’s scratching, our subsequent entrance into the room, and the departure of Stanley for his indoor walk. But last night when I went into their bedroom after Stanley had started whining, all three dogs greeted me with their tails wagging.

As soon as Stanley saw me approaching with his collar, he turned around and raced into the crate farthest away from me. Then he crept out, head down, tail tucked, and nervously offered me his neck. He is very afraid of his harness, collar, and leash, but apparently at night he’s more afraid of being left in the bedroom.

I fastened the collar around his neck and trotted downstairs with him. We began our route. As I passed the stairs leading up to the dog room, I saw that Mina and Paco had left their bedroom and were standing on the landing staring down at us. Mina immediately bent down into a play bow, and barked excitedly at me when she saw me looking at her.

Paco barked too, but his bark was more of a “Why are you chasing Mommy? Get away from her!” directed at Stanley. I headed into the kitchen, and on my next cycle I saw Mina and Paco run down the stairs. Mina darted in front of me and then stood still, barking and trying to get me to play this new game with her.

Paco decided to follow me around the house, barking furiously, because he could not figure out why Stanley was following me around. Paco gets horribly jealous of any dog that has my attention. If I pick up Stanley and put him on my lap, Paco immediately leaps out of bed and begins to scrabble at my legs. If I take Stanley on a walk by himself, Paco will run at him as soon as we come home, and yell at Stanley and sniff him suspiciously. If I try to brush Mina or Stanley outside, Paco will sidle up to me and slowly insert his body between my hand and the other dog.

Since Paco needs to lose weight anyway, I figured him following us around didn’t matter, but I did try to get him to stop barking because Chris needed to get up early the next day. So there we were, me walking quickly around our furniture yelling, “Shut up, Paco,” followed by a morose and confused Stanley, followed by Paco barking madly, and occasionally passing Beano standing in the kitchen and barking every time we passed.

After a few rounds of this, I headed upstairs to put everyone back in bed. Mina and Paco did the Treat Dance, which involves prancing and slapping their front paws on the floor while gazing unblinkingly at me, and Stanley buried himself in the purple sack on the chair. Everyone got their treats and went to bed, and the rest of the night was peaceful, although I did wonder to myself whether it was time to buy curtains for the front window, the window that looks directly into our living room and dining room, the window through which neighbors can see our nighttime parade.

Posted by: ssjane | April 17, 2007 | 11:01 am
Posted in: Dogs